mind.in.a.box: lyrics

Crossroads

Introspection

two days ago I woke up underwater.
they were watching me from outside,
and somehow I now knew their names.
Night and the Friend just smiled at me,
and then the glass shattered.

I awoke in an empty flat that told me nothing,
and I knew that I had to get away.
White had tried to erase my identity,
but the Sleepwalkers had saved my mind.

Amnesia

I can see myself tucked in and fast asleep,
looking all peaceful, but in my dreams I weep.
from far up I'm looking down upon myself,
and I wonder who it is that's lying there.
I feel like in a world all beside myself,
afraid I won't wake up, with no one there to care.

I know someone used to watch me in my sleep,
but some things seem just impossible to keep.
I fight hard to bring it back into my mind,
but to no use, it all seems to be a blank.
I wonder what it was that had me defined,
but one thing I know: I have myself to thank.

I feel like I have amnesia,
but I know it's myself I've lost.
I wonder what's happened so far,
and what might have been the cost.

I'm not sure I want to know
any of the things I've done.
I don't know yet where to go,
but I'll accept my past is gone.

I feel like I have amnesia,
and I've missed the heavenly host.
I'm surprised I've come this far,
living without what I need most.

I don't think I can go back,
to the things that were before.
though I'm now always wearing black,
I don't bemoan my life of yore.

I wake up and feel like I should be at home,
but I do not know this, it's not where I belong.
my head is dazed and my mind is all confused,
and I'm not quite sure that I'm really there.
but the mirror shows me looking out, bemused,
into a blank place that could be anywhere.

I feel like I have been left out in the cold,
and it hurts to know that this is all my fault.
I leave this place to find familiar ground,
but the whole world seems to have been rearranged.
now my former self is nowhere to be found,
and I know that it's myself that's changed.

Into the Night

there was nothing left to feel,
when I fell into the night.
I thought that I would never heal,
but that night I was reborn.

"I need a drink ...
as long as it's strong enough... ...
my name? ... I don't know ... my name."

"that's right. no card at all ...
yeah, great."

"hey! you know a place called "The Pi"? ...
no, I know. but I can't remember."

"let me in ... I've been here before ...
no, I didn't destroy your door.
yeah, right, I've started already."

"is that guy a regular? ...
yeah, I'm sure I've seen him before ...
who's he talking to?"

"so you remember the night when I was following that girl? ...
what happened that night? ...
no, I don't know any of the bands on this list ...
Sleepwalkers? never heard ... what are they?"

the sun is already up.
I will never believe how bright it can be at this hour.

there was nothing left to feel,
when I fell into the night.
I thought that I would never heal,
but that night I was reborn.

"I need a room ...
no, as long as there's a bed... ...
my name? ... Black ... my name is Black."

Identity

there was this empty shell,
and I called it my life.
sometimes it felt like hell,
but it was easy to survive.

time was like a drain,
that didn't flush me down.
there was no room for pain,
and not one chance to drown.

I want to cut off all my ties,
I need to break through all the ice.
I want it to evaporate,
and cease to be a surrogate.

I want to raise a thunderstorm.
I want to bring down all the rain.
I want to be the flood that cleans.
I want to know what my life means.

I want to cut off all my ties,
I need to break through all the ice.
I want it to evaporate,
and cease to be a surrogate.

I want to find the strength I need,
to truly follow my own lead.
I want to find my destiny,
and know my own identity.

I got up every day,
to do as I was told.
I felt like a piece of clay,
for someone else to mold.

my suit fit me just fine,
and my shirt was always clean.
my thoughts they were never mine,
but there was no need to scream.

I looked left and right,
and they were all the same.
I lay awake at night,
and tried to recall my name.

I got up the next day,
and took a long last look.
there was no time to stay,
on the first page of this book.

[ref]

I want to know who I am.

Lucid Dreams 1

why was I so afraid? Night was not afraid...

Fear

you float in a million lights,
but the one you seek is not there.
you fight in a million fights,
but it's yourself you cannot bear.

you think you are a leader,
but you turn everyone away.
you think you are a preacher,
but you can't turn night into day.

there is something inside of me,
and I know that it's growing.
the thing that will forever be,
and I feel its shadow calling.

it is the fear that drives you mad.
it is the fear that makes you blind.
it is the fear that keeps you sad.
it is the fear that kills your mind.

you think you can make things grow,
but in truth you are like a desert.
you think it's not your ego,
and that others make you hurt.

you have learned how to deceive,
and yourself is all you can hear.
you think you really believe,
but deep down you are only fear.

there is something inside of me,
that makes me run against the wall.
the thing my eyes don't want to see,
that will obliterate my soul.

it is the fear that eats you up.
it is the fear that makes you cry.
it is the fear that takes you down.
it is the fear that will not die.

everyone's afraid, but that's no excuse.

Stalkers

we are the stalkers.
we are your shadow.

it's me.
I really hope you will be able to hear this,
and I hope it won't take too long.
I feel completely lost, and I know there is
something really strange going on.

I've been like this far too long,
it's getting worse and worse.
I feel like I haven't slept in ages.

I can feel them always right behind,
casting a shadow on my mind.
but I know I have to hang on.

we know who it is we want.
we have a collective mind.
we don't miss a single step.
we're always right behind.

we know we serve someone else.
we have swallowed our pride.
we march to this tune of loss.
we take this in our stride.

now all my hope is that you're really there,
and my mind has almost turned insane.

can you hear this?
are you out there?

please help me turn back the pages.
I want to go back, from where I came!

how much time has passed?
I can feel they're almost here.

can you hear me?
where have you gone?

I can feel my thoughts dying out,
so my last thought is just your name.
and it is all that will remain.

I can hear them coming...
I will be one of them...

What Used to Be

your dark eyes are staring wide,
but they are unable to see.
there used to be light inside,
now all lost in reverie.

there used to be something else,
but you already forgot.
you used to buy all that sells,
and go through with your own plot.

images are flashing by,
and your eyes, they stare right through.
no matter how hard you'd try,
look on is all you could do.

what used to be.

you feel the need to lie down,
to take a break from the break.
you feel as though you would drown,
at the bottom of a lake.

you are dreaming of what used to be,
and think you have taken the wrong turn.
you have to get over your fallacy,
and light the fire that made you burn.

you are still holding on to the past,
but you have to look up at the sky.
you know that life is moving too fast,
to have regrets before you die.

you are dreaming of what used to be,
but you have to start with a clean slate.
you will snap out of your reverie,
and you will know it is not too late.

you snap out of your reverie,
because you know it is not too late.

The Place

I will stay out here tonight,
looking at the starry sky.
I haven't been here in a long time,
but this place was always there.

whatever happened in the meantime,
all the things that just passed it by.
I never thought I would come back here,
for it to tell me who I am.

I could feel it reaching out to me.
I might just as well close my eyes now,
and feel this place inside myself.

and whoever I was, it doesn't matter anymore I know,
all these memories hidden deep down below.
though somewhere on the way before, all those things got lost,
I know there will be new things wherever I may go.

so whatever it was, I don't care for it anymore I know,
no time for mourning 'cause there are new things to sow.
though I thought I knew who I was, it must have been someone else,
I don't care what I knew, but I know now it's time to go.

and whoever I was, it doesn't matter anymore I know,
all these memories hidden deep down below.
though somewhere on the way before, all those things got lost,
I know there will be new things wherever I may go.

Redefined

I look back, so much time.
what once was, now it's gone.
now it's fine, now it's fine.

I had to leave myself,
to find out who I am,
and to build a new self.

I look back, so far back.
and I know it's all gone.
I'm so glad, I'm so glad.

I have found a new life.
there's a line in my past,
cuts it off like a knife.

I will kill the machine,
because it has to be done.
get over what I have been,
and then never need to run.

I will realize my dream,
with all the blood in my veins,
to fight the machine,
until none of it remains.

and everything somehow led me to a fresh new start.
so little and so much to cure my pain and to redefine who I am.
now everything is leading me right into the future,
all the worries of my past gone and never coming back again.

I look back, so much time.
what once was, now it's gone.
now it's fine, now it's fine.

I had to find myself,
to become who I am,
to define my new self.

and everything somehow led me to a fresh new start.
so little and so much to cure my pain and to redefine who I am.
now everything is leading me right into the future,
all the worries of my past gone and never coming back again.

I look back, so far back.
and I know now it's good.
I'm so glad, I'm so glad.

I have found my new life,
there's a line in my past,
cuts it off, like a knife.

Lucid Dreams 2

there it was, up ahead. and I was not afraid anymore...

Crossroads

I have never seen this coming.
I have never climbed so high.
I have never thought this could
be the crossroads of my life.

I have never seen the choices,
I have never soared the sky.
I have always thought I am
living just to stay alive.

I let myself fall that night,
to be carried by the sound.
I let it all just happen,
without restraint or bound.

I was afloat in the night,
and it was the only route.
I could not hear my thinking,
the din was drowning it all out.

I went further and further,
the music swallowed me whole.
I had to push more and more,
to know how deep I could fall.

I felt my grip slip away,
and my time was running out.
there would be but one instant,
for me to vanquish my doubt.

how long since I slept?
how long since I ate?
how long since I felt?
how long since I cared?

I have never heard the voices,
they have never made me cry.
I have never thought this would
be the crossroads of my life.

I have never seen the choices,
I have never soared the sky.
I have always thought I am
living just to stay alive.

I have never seen this coming.
I have never climbed so high.
I have never thought this could
be the crossroads of my life.

Run for Your Life

Run for your life

Come to me
Come to me

Leave me alone
Leave me alone

Come to me
Come to me

............................